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Friday, August 26, 2011

Slacker.

I have realized that the things I most enjoy in my life when it comes to hobbies seem to be the hardest for me to share with others. Not just for fear of being judged by the level of talent I may possess but also for some unknown reason of making time to put it out there for others to even see.


Photography and writing are outlets in my life that all to often get left behind from my daily routine even though they seem to bring me the best sense of peace and understanding about myself.


When I started this blog (for the millionth time, I swear!) I had made a vow to myself to keep up on it... I guess I should have been slightly more realistic that I had a baby on the way and given myself some leeway that I may not be as free to sit down and write in the first few months because that is exactly what happened. Oh well, instead of starting the whole blog over again and making it seem like I always stay up on it... I have embraced my "Slacker" side and have set a new goal for myself. Instead of attempting to ALWAYS write out of obligation, I am going to write when I feel inspired to and when I feel the need to. For me, that may be several times a day or months and months apart.


Whatever it may be I hope those who choose to read my words or view my pictures I may post will be able to gather an insight into the life I am living and the experiences I am going through.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Jordan's Birth Story

On April 25th (my due date) I went into my doctor's office for a check up. He decided that although I was not having any issues he wanted to send me to the hospital to be induced. He doesn't really like for women to go past their due dates anyway plus he was going to be heading to a conference on the 27th and wanted to make sure he would be here to deliver the baby. He called the hospital and scheduled my admission time for 2pm.

All my parents,my good friend Kaeti, Jason and I went to Black Bear Diner to eat something since I was not considered active labor yet and Dr. Lo wanted me to eat something before heading in.

Around 5pm I was given cytogel to start my contractions and by 7pm I was having them about 3 minutes apart however they were not extremely strong. They checked my dilation around 9pm and I was now at 5 cm. They decided to not give me another pill since it seemed to be working just fine and it then became a waiting game.

At 11pm they gave me some mild medicine through my IV to help me sleep so I could get some rest before the intense labor kicked in and to lessen the intensity of the contractions I was having so I could fall asleep. The nurses woke me up to be checked again around 12 or 1 am and I was still dilated to 5 cm which meant although I was contracting things were not strong enough. they decided to give me Pitocin to help make them stronger and we would re-evaluate in a few hours.
Dr. Lo came in to have my water broken at 5:30am in an effort to make the progress move faster. Up until this point my contractions were painful but manageable... after he broke my water, NOT SO MUCH! My goal was to try and go through labor without an epidural.... unfortunately for my "perfect labor plan" that did not happen. I was informed around 6:30am that I had to choose to either take an epidural now or wait at least 3 hours for the anesthesiologist to be free after the scheduled Cesarean that was taking place at 7:00am. (They apparently only had one doctor who could perform this procedure in the hospital) I was only dilated to 5 1/2 cm and the pain I was feeling was strong enough and I had a little less then half way to go for full dilation that I chose to not chance labor without the medicine to find out an hour and half later I couldn't handle the pain and have no way out from it. The process of accepting a giant needle in my back scared me but because they had to get me taken care of in such a short amount of time (the doctor had to be in the operating room by 6:45am) it left little room to show fear or ease into the process. Luckily I had a great doctor/nurse team performing the epidural and they were quick precise and left little room for issues. I would have to say one of the biggest challenges I had during my entire labor was holding still during a full blown contraction for the doctor to place the needle in my back.

Things seemed to move pretty smoothly after the epidural was input. I was checked around 10am and found to be closer to 7 cm... things were getting close!


At 12:30pm the nurse checked my dilation and discovered I was fully dilated and said it was about time to start pushing! I couldn't believe we were going to see our baby soon!




My plan was not to have a mirror or any outside help during pushing but in the end I used the mirror and to my surprise Jason watched the whole experience! He was a fantastic help and I am so thankful to have a loving husband who could be my rock and also handle the whole birthing process with such strength. I pushed for approximately 20 minutes and although I couldn't feel an intense amount of pain I was able to still feel contractions and even the baby being delievered.




At 1:18pm we welcomed Jordan Patrick Tharp into the world! I will NEVER forget the sound of Jason, now a proud father, looking at me through tear filled eyes and saying, "We have a baby boy! It's a boy!" The emotions that overcame both of us were powerful and so very hard to explain... waiting for almost 4 years to hold our baby and finally getting to do so was surreal.



Shortly after I birthed him the nurses quickly grabbed him from my arms because he had stopped crying. They were fearful that something was wrong but in turn it was just Jordan's sweet nature. He was quiet and content and perfectly fine with APGAR scores of 10 across the board. :)



Now for the scary part of the wonderful day... (graphic information below)
Jason and Kaeti (She was amazing and took our photos during the birth!) went out to the waiting room to share the good news and inform our family that we had a boy and when they returned to the room they were welcomed by a large amount of blood hitting the floor and Dr. Lo saying, "you don't see that on the discovery channel".
I was hemorrhaging and losing a lot of blood quickly. Initially I had no idea what was going on and really had no opportunity to be scared because the medical staff was working so quickly. I had nurses on top of me pushing down on my stomach (what I later learned was they were trying to make my uterus contract), the doctor doing who knows what down below and Jason standing between me and Jordan under the heat lamp with a very concerned and scared look on his face. At the time I didn't understand the severity or danger of the situation and when he looked at me with the expression of "what do I do?" I told him to go be with Jordan, that I was fine and would be okay. The remainder of my memory during this period is quite hazy (I'm sure in part from the lack of blood) and the last thing I can make out was the doctor saying that if they were not going to be able to stop the bleeding within 2 minutes I was heading in for surgery.


I have since learned that what was happening to my body was very serious and had I gone in for surgery my child rearing days would be over. They would have had to have performed a hysterectomy to stop the bleeding if my uterus wouldn't have started contracting. I am forever thankful to God for holding me close during this time and blessing us with a great medical team working on me to prevent the surgery. In the end it was determined that I had gone from a hemoglobin of almost 12 to now 5.7 and had to have 2 blood transfusions. Apparently your body holds about 5 units of blood and I had essentially lost almost3. I was not able to get up and move around (nor would I have even been able to since sitting up was almost out of the question) so it fell to Jason to do most of the baby things at first.

In the end I consider the birth to have been relatively easy and above all else we were blessed with a wonderful little boy who has since become our everything.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

It's a boy!

Jordan Patrick Tharp

April 26th, 2011

1:18pm

7 pounds 13 ounces

20 inches long


We are so excited to welcome our little man into the world and cannot wait for everyone to meet him! He has already been such a blessing and we cannot wait for every moment that is to come! I already don't want him to get any bigger... :)

Thursday, April 14, 2011

2 centimeters...

It's official, my body has begun the birthing process and I am considered 2 centimeters! The size of a penny... I have a LONG way to go!



Baby Tharp will be here soon... I can't wait to see if we are having a little boy or little girl!

Monday, April 11, 2011

Brooke Beasley Photography

This local Tracy photographer was amazing! I am in love with every picture we have seen so far... I only wish we could have had her take our wedding pictures too! :) If you are in the area, you need to book a session with her!

Staci M Frigerio Photography

I was given the opportunity to have my pregnancy pictures taken for free to help a photographer build her portfolio. Here are a few shots...




A fresh new start...

As we embark on an the next stage in our lives it is my goal to begin a blog (again) to help keep our loved ones more in tune with our comings, goings and everything in between... especially with having a little one soon!

A quick review of our life so far... *We have been married for going on 5 wonderful years in June. Life hasn't been the easiest path for us so far but through it all we have kept not only God the center of our marriage but have remained strong and faithful to each other. I couldn't have asked for a better person to spend my life with and I know without his strength and love we wouldn't be together today!

*Our first children were our two wonderful puppies, Kita and Jax whom we both love VERY much. I know they can be high maintenance and others don't always find them as fantastic as we do but it is their involvement in our lives that has brightened some of the worst days and kept us content even when we were longing for a little one.

*We began trying to have a baby after a year of marriage. Initially we tried for a year and to no avail we were not blessed with a baby. We began to question if there was an underlying issue and sure enough it was established I had what is called, Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome. It essentially is a fancy word for multiple cysts on my ovaries that can cause me to not ovulate regularly. I was then placed on fertility medicine (clomid) throughout the course of the next two years off and on and still was not successful. I had been very stubborn and had a lack of faith in the Lord to go to a fertility clinic because financially we knew it was something we would not be able to afford. When I was blessed with left over money in 2010 from a flexible spending account we decided to use it on a consultation visit.

Two months later I was supposed to begin the next step in treatment when I began having terrible menstrual pains. It turned out that I was actually pregnant but sadly the baby was ectopic (attached inside my right fallopian tube instead of my uterus). I was beginning to have internal bleeding in my stomach and was rushed to the hospital for surgery because if my tube was to rupture then I would be in a life or death situation. It was a miracle that I was seeing a fertility specialist and being monitored... without her, I may not be here today. The goal was to try and salvage my tube if possible but unfortunately it was not repairable so two and half hours after surgery we lost baby Tharp as well as my right tube. Now we were left to deal with the loss of a child as well as the realization that another pregnancy would be potentially even more difficult.

We did not begin trying again for a few months because we wanted to just take time to heal emotionally from what we had just been through however God had other plans. The month we were supposed to start the fertility treatment we discovered I was yet again pregnant and this time... everything was in the correct place! :) Praise the Lord!

Several trials later throughout this pregnancy (high risk, kidney issues, complication pains from the ectopic surgery, etc) we are at 38 weeks and patiently awaiting our precious little one!

*Amidst this pregnancy Jason was also promoted within Les Schwab to an assistant manager in Tracy, CA. So we packed everything up and moved over 600 miles from family and friends... It hasn't been the easiest transition, especially expecting our first baby, but it was such a blessing for our overall family situation and we know it was only through God that this opportunity was even made possible. It was something he had been working towards for 5 years and yet again the Lord made it possible when we least expected it.

Looking back we can see the Lord's hand in all the things we embarked upon on our path together and it has definitely renewed our spirits that no matter what He truly knows all and through Him all things are possible. We are excited for the next step in our life and whatever may come from it... :)